Feedback on my poem?????

[Guest]

I wake up in the morning<br />
After feeling a pleasant breeze<br />
I wake up so excited<br />
To play with my man<br />
As I look around the room<br />
I realize that my bed is empty<br />
And all I have left of you<br />
Are memories of our love

 

[TheBASHoologist]

its a gay poem.....right?

edit- not bashing or anything, but i think yer poem is great, it just needs a little metaphoric content, but your on the go, good job

 

[g_]

Aww.

Cute )

 

[Anastasia]

That last four lines aren't bad... the beginning just sounds cheesy and forced.

 

[AaronsGirl]

I think your poem is awesome. Not only is it awesome, it is sad story of a heartbroken lover. Great job!

 

[hammatimebiatch]

awesome! I really liked it I thought it was great, pure genius!